The internet is a wonderful thing, it takes about 5 minutes to sell off your life or barter it away – you take my place for 12 months, I'll give you access to all my possessions (except my books) so long as you don't fuck all my stuff up…seems like a good deal all around. But, the weirdos who've come out of the closet in this latest endeavor have made me question giving anyone access to my stuff – even though I intend to sell or donate everything when I get back (I need a purge, I've become one of those people who possesses too much and most of it has very little meaning…what's the point of having so many things if there's no purpose or meaning to them, if I feel no tie to them?…but I digress).
I've only been showing my apt for three days but I've already been able to find classifications of people coming by: I have the "look-e-loos" who must like going around looking at places with no intent (or means) to buy, it would be maddening to me, then you have the "negotiators" those wonderful people (mostly men), who come through, tuck their fingers into their belt loops, tug their trousers up and over their muffin top and then try to get down to the business of negotiating a better rental rate, asking for utilities to be paid for (by me no less), etc…these jerkals (as my friend JM says) make me laugh because they honestly think I'm going to engage in negotiating an already really good deal. Sorry. Then you have the "Nigerian Princes" these people who may as well be, and potentially are, from another country because they want to send money to secure the place from Bali or wherever they are writing to you from if you can just send your banking information so they can put the full years rent in your account…ummm, right. You'd think scam artists would try a little harder or be better at it.
I'm sure there will be more people coming through but Friday is my deadline to find someone or break my lease. Honestly, after seeing 8 people and having only one of them seem normal and sane, I'm beginning to wonder if breaking my lease isn't such a bad idea after all…
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